Advertisement Thief
While my mother struggles to put on socks, my father usually dissects the Sunday paper and sets the comics section and Parade magazine insert on the table next to her breakfast bowl, as these are the two sections she makes sure to read.
Though most towns have their own local publications, the Omaha World Herald is the major state-wide newspaper. Since my parents are now closer to the metro area, every weekend edition is packed with additional fliers and coupons advertising specials in the city. Thus, for the last two years, my father’s morning routine has included grumbling about the extra half-inch of inserts that he immediately tosses in the recycling pile.
On one particular morning, he is surprised to pick the paper off the front step and find only the main sections.
With nothing to complain about, he supplements his usual ranting by tracking the missing advertisements to the garage and then trying to figure out how they got there.
He interrogates my mother, but she just stares back at him, her mind lost in the question.
Later, from behind the Living section, he will mentally recreate the scene where my mother gets up early, removes the stack of inserts, hides them in the garage, and then returns the heart of the paper back to the front step. He will relish in the knowledge that for a few minutes, he was in his wife’s increasingly precious thoughts.
Though most towns have their own local publications, the Omaha World Herald is the major state-wide newspaper. Since my parents are now closer to the metro area, every weekend edition is packed with additional fliers and coupons advertising specials in the city. Thus, for the last two years, my father’s morning routine has included grumbling about the extra half-inch of inserts that he immediately tosses in the recycling pile.
On one particular morning, he is surprised to pick the paper off the front step and find only the main sections.
With nothing to complain about, he supplements his usual ranting by tracking the missing advertisements to the garage and then trying to figure out how they got there.
He interrogates my mother, but she just stares back at him, her mind lost in the question.
Later, from behind the Living section, he will mentally recreate the scene where my mother gets up early, removes the stack of inserts, hides them in the garage, and then returns the heart of the paper back to the front step. He will relish in the knowledge that for a few minutes, he was in his wife’s increasingly precious thoughts.
Comments
Post a Comment